Coffee with a Water Lily

I realized just recently that I'd never published the post I wrote below from months ago. Re-reading it I can still feel the gut-wrenching fear that had gripped me when I first came to graduate school. And I can now honestly admit that I am on the other side. After almost a year spent fighting to prove myself as an actor, I had a moment of realization. The things we are most passionate about are the only things we're willing to wade through the deepest levels of fear and anxiety in order to master. When we feel the life that comes from living and breathing the dreams and talents that are planted within us, we become addicted. Only it's an addiction that feeds, rather then drains. It's like water, or air, or love. When we step into the places that we are called to be, it's like parts of us we knew were there but couldn't grasp before, suddenly fall into place. I am an actress, I'm a writer, I'm a singer and a performer. I'm a friend, a sister, a c

Sometimes you just need to write. Usually I stick to journaling, but every once in a while when my process feels extra profound, I get the urge to blog. As you can see it's been a while since my last post and so much and so little has happened between then and now, but what is true, is that I am not immune to the human desire to be liked. I thought I kicked this base fear of "I'm not good enough/likable" a while ago. I thought, "I've conquered the terrifying territory that is self love and come up stronger, wiser and well-grounded". This was and still is true, but in the meantime I got my ass kicked and my foundations pretty shook by insecurity and and a demon pretending to be "growth".  Often, when we are faced with new experiences, like a new job, a new skill, a new opportunity, we are hit with a sense of insecurity, fear and inferiority. We look at those around us who have already mastered the skill we are just begininng to learn  an